{"id":5299,"date":"2026-07-31T21:38:02","date_gmt":"2026-07-31T21:38:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/relocationobserver.com\/?p=5299"},"modified":"2026-07-31T21:38:02","modified_gmt":"2026-07-31T21:38:02","slug":"olivia-wilde-and-cooper-hoffman-used-pain-scale-ratings-to-prep-bdsm-scenes-in-i-want-your-sex-she-hit-him-really-hard-and-it-was-only-a-seven-or-eight","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/relocationobserver.com\/?p=5299","title":{"rendered":"Olivia Wilde and Cooper Hoffman Used Pain Scale Ratings to Prep BDSM Scenes in \u2018I Want Your Sex\u2019: She \u2018Hit Him Really Hard and\u2019 It Was \u2018Only a Seven or Eight\u2019"},"content":{"rendered":"
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\n\tCooper Hoffman had never filmed a sex scene before signing on to Gregg Araki\u2019s erotic thriller \u201cI Want Your Sex.\u201d So when he arrived on set for the first time and found himself surrounded by ball gags, stilettos, whips, chains, dildos and strap-ons, a few first-day jitters were understandable.<\/p>\n

Read more Tom Corson Promoted to Chief Operating Officer at Warner Music Group<\/a><\/p>\n

\n\t\u201cEven if you\u2019re nervous to do it, you\u2019re gonna do it,\u201d Hoffman told Variety<\/em> at the film\u2019s Los Angeles premiere on Tuesday night. \u201cBecause there\u2019s no reason to not do anything in this life just because you\u2019re scared.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n\tStill, how does an actor prepare to strip naked, slip into a maid\u2019s outfit and get spanked with a leather whip? This is just one of many, many kinky situations Hoffman encounters as Elliot, a meek, wide-eyed college graduate who enters into a sadomasochistic relationship with gallery owner Erika Tracey (Olivia Wilde).<\/p>\n

\n\tIncreasingly, the answer comes in the form of an intimacy coordinator \u2014 a role that Araki, long known for embracing provocative themes, employed for the first time on this project. The profession, which officially unionized with SAG-AFTRA in 2024, has become an increasingly standard presence on film and television sets.<\/p>\n

\n\tIntimacy coordinator Yehuda Duenyas likens the job to that of a choreographer or stunt coordinator. \u201cIf someone is going to get their head blown off, people are like, \u2018Go grab the goo gun, get the exploding head with the squibs in it, press the button and boom.\u2019 No one really bats an eye about violence,\u201d he says. \u201cBut when it comes to intimacy, everyone gets\u00a0kind of squishy\u00a0and weird.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n\t\u201cThere are so many things to look after with intimacy scenes that no one really sees,\u201d he continues. \u201cIt\u2019s\u00a0the same way that, with a stunt,\u00a0you\u2019re\u00a0not seeing the padding or the fake hits. It just looks real, but you know\u00a0there\u2019s\u00a0a lot of movie magic happening behind the scenes.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n\tThat movie magic is put to work throughout the film, which uses high-intensity montages to establish the pair\u2019s dom-sub dynamic: Elliot crawling across the floor in pink silk lingerie, taking a spanking in a maid\u2019s outfit, standing fully nude as a hot-pink dildo is lubed up overhead and, during a threesome-gone-wrong, getting handcuffed to a St. Andrew\u2019s cross with a towel stuffed in his mouth.<\/p>\n

\n\t \u201cHe might have been terrified, but it\u00a0wasn\u2019t, \u2018I\u2019m terrified, I\u00a0don\u2019t\u00a0want to do this.\u2019 It was, \u2018I\u2019m terrified, and I do want to do this,’\u201d Duenyas says of Hoffman. \u201cHe was more like, \u2018Yeah,\u00a0yeah,\u00a0it\u2019s\u00a0the scariest thing\u00a0I\u2019ve\u00a0ever done.\u00a0Let\u2019s\u00a0do it.’\u201d<\/p>\n

\n\tBelow, Duenyas talks about how he prepared Wilde and Hoffman for their most intense on-screen moments, the most challenging scenes to shoot and the film\u2019s overall messaging on sex and experimentation:<\/p>\n

\n\t\tThere are multiple high-intensity montages that establish the nature of Olivia and Cooper\u2019s dom-sub sexual relationship. What would surprise people about what goes into shooting scenes like that?\t<\/h5>\n

\n\tWith those montages specifically, we had moments where we would say, \u201cOkay, I\u2019m hitting you this hard. What is that on a scale of one to 10?\u201d Cooper would say, \u201cThat\u2019s a zero.\u201d She\u2019d say, \u201cReally?\u201d Then she would go harder, and he\u2019d say, \u201cOkay, that\u2019s a two. That\u2019s a three. That\u2019s a five.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n\tOlivia realized, \u201cI can hit you really hard, and it\u2019s only registering as a seven or an eight.\u201d We had a bunch of little things like that so they could, number one, have a language for communicating about the physicality and, number two, feel like they could talk about what was happening while also making it look good.<\/p>\n

\nGregg told Variety<\/em> that Olivia came onto the set with much more experience doing nude scenes, while Cooper was\u00a0\u201cterrified.\u201d\u00a0What was your process for making him more comfortable from the beginning?<\/strong>\u00a0\t<\/h5>\n

\n\tIf\u00a0you\u2019ve\u00a0ever gone skydiving, you might be terrified, but you really want to go skydiving.\u00a0You\u2019re\u00a0there to do it. Or, if\u00a0you\u2019ve\u00a0ever jumped off a cliff into water or stood on a high diving board,\u00a0you\u2019re\u00a0on top of that thing to do it, even though\u00a0you\u2019re\u00a0scared.\u00a0So,\u00a0yeah, he might have been terrified, but it\u00a0wasn\u2019t, \u201cI\u2019m terrified, I\u00a0don\u2019t\u00a0want to do this.\u201d It was, \u201cI\u2019m terrified, and I do want to do this.\u201d <\/p>\n

Read more Paramount Seeks Antitrust Trial in November, While States Ask for April 2027<\/a><\/p>\n

\n\tIs someone terrified because\u00a0they\u2019re\u00a0thinking, \u201cThis is a\u00a0no\u00a0for me. This is a hard boundary, but I\u2019m involved in this thing and I already said yes, so what am I going to do?\u201d Are they biting their nails or is it, \u201cI\u2019m\u00a0fucking terrified.\u00a0Let\u2019s do this really well.\u00a0How are we going to do this?\u201d <\/p>\n

\n\tThat was Cooper\u2019s stance. I\u00a0wouldn\u2019t\u00a0say he was terrified. If\u00a0you\u2019ve\u00a0ever talked to him,\u00a0he\u2019s\u00a0super cool and very together. He was more like, \u201cYeah,\u00a0yeah,\u00a0it\u2019s\u00a0the scariest thing\u00a0I\u2019ve\u00a0ever done.\u00a0Let\u2019s\u00a0do it.\u201d It was very\u00a0matter-of-fact.\u00a0He approaches\u00a0almost everything\u00a0he does by diving headfirst into it in this\u00a0really beautiful\u00a0way.\u00a0He\u2019s\u00a0an incredible performer.<\/p>\n

\nHow did the\u00a0dom-sub type of sex\u00a0scenes differ\u00a0from the more traditional sex scenes\u00a0you\u2019re\u00a0used to working on?<\/strong>\u00a0\t<\/h5>\n

\n\tSure, there are differences, but in terms of the way we approach intimacy coordination as a craft, it\u2019s not that different. Olivia had also done a lot of research. Everyone brought what they knew and the type of story they wanted to tell. Gregg obviously did as well.<\/p>\n

\n\tIn this particular film, we\u2019re dealing with these very specific, blurry and complicated power dynamics. That\u2019s the story. The story shows up in their relationship, their work lives and their sexual lives together. What was so fun was finding the character of their intimacy together.<\/p>\n

\n\tEvery intimate scene we work on has a different type of character, and that was the character for this one. Is it different? Yes. BDSM and these kinds of lifestyle scenes, if you want to call them that, are different from something like a \u201cHeated Rivalry\u201d scene. It\u2019s a different type of intimacy, but we approach it the way we would approach anything else.<\/p>\n

\nI\u2019m guessing one of the main differences is how\u00a0many props are involved.\u00a0What was the most challenging\u00a0scene to\u00a0work on?<\/strong>\u00a0\t<\/h5>\n

\n\tThe threesome scene, from a blocking and camera-angle perspective, took a minute to figure out. When I say \u201ca minute,\u201d we had a really compressed shooting schedule. We shot all the intimacy within the first five days. We did all of that stuff upfront.<\/p>\n

\n\tAlso from an intensity perspective, that scene required a lot. There was a lot to work out. It wasn\u2019t, \u201cOh my God, this is so hard.\u201d It was a puzzle to put together in terms of the traffic patterns, the handcuffing and how to get out of the handcuffs quickly. Are we fiddling with keys, or are we just getting out of them? There are a lot of little details. Which details are you going to skip for the sake of the story, and which details are you going to keep in to maintain the flavor and the vibe of the story?<\/p>\n

\n\tAll of the restraint scenes needed a little more care. Getting an actor into restraints on the St. Andrew\u2019s cross wasn\u2019t that complicated of a scene. But when you have to shoot it from three angles in three different ways, and an actor is strapped to a St. Andrew\u2019s cross, can they get out easily if they need to pee?<\/p>\n

\nGregg\u00a0recently\u00a0talked to Variety<\/em>\u00a0about\u00a0Gen Z\u2019s attitude\u00a0towards\u00a0sex and what he hoped to accomplish with this film. What are your thoughts on this mission statement?<\/strong> <\/h5>\n

\n\tGregg wants people to go out and argue. He really wants people to argue about it and say, \u201cWell, I thought it was this,\u201d or, \u201cI thought it was\u00a0that,\u201d or, \u201cI think that\u2019s bullshit,\u201d or, \u201cI think that\u2019s true.\u201d He wants those conversations.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\n\tI love Gregg, and\u00a0I\u2019ve\u00a0loved his work over the years. He has contributed so much. I learned about intimacy through watching Gregg\u00a0Araki films as a young person. I feel like we owe him for his contribution to intimacy in cinema. He has contributed so much to the film canon. Where would we be without those pieces he has made and the work he has put in?<\/p>\n

\n\tI\u00a0can\u2019t\u00a0speak for Gen Z, and I\u00a0don\u2019t\u00a0know whether Gen Z is having less or more sex. But I hope people see this film and want to take a chance\u00a0on\u00a0love, take a chance\u00a0on\u00a0experimentation, take a chance\u00a0on feeling\u00a0something and allow themselves to be taken to a place they haven\u2019t been before.\u00a0<\/p>\n

Read more DC and HBO\u2019s \u2018Booster Gold\u2019 Show \u2018Won\u2019t Be Moving Forward,\u2019 Says Writer David Jenkins<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Olivia Wilde and Cooper Hoffman prepped for their BDSM scenes in I Want Your Sex using a<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5298,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[217],"tags":[4189],"class_list":["post-5299","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-artisans","tag-i-want-your-sex"],"yoast_head":"\nOlivia Wilde and Cooper Hoffman Used Pain Scale Ratings to Prep BDSM Scenes in \u2018I Want Your Sex\u2019: She \u2018Hit Him Really Hard and\u2019 It Was \u2018Only a Seven or Eight\u2019 - Relocation Observer<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/relocationobserver.com\/?p=5299\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Olivia Wilde and Cooper Hoffman Used Pain Scale Ratings to Prep BDSM Scenes in \u2018I Want Your Sex\u2019: She \u2018Hit Him Really Hard and\u2019 It Was \u2018Only a Seven or Eight\u2019 - 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